Each Elemental Personality has unique expectations and needs. Learn to have a more harmonious holiday with them all here.

Every year about this time, in the name of holiday harmony I post a brief reminder of what’s likely to matter most to the people in your life (and to you!) during the holiday season. These observations are based on the known priorities and preferences of our primary elemental personalities. There are also a few suggestions regarding ways to keep the season happy for everyone at the same time.

"I know these still aren’t normal times, but I think I’ve done pretty well during the pandemic. Yet as winter approaches, I’ve started worrying more about the holidays again."

“I live in a state experiencing high Covid-19 numbers and we’ve all been told we should cancel Thanksgiving, and maybe even Christmas. ... I’m so depressed; we probably won’t have anything at like the normal holiday season I look forward to every year. Even my husband, who often complains about all he has to accomplish as part of ‘doing the holidays’ seems a bit frustrated by the changes. Do you have any suggestions on how to cope with all this?”

“Thanksgiving is coming and because of Covid, I’ve decided it’s best if I don’t travel home to be with my elderly parents this year. It’s the right thing to do, but my heart literally aches over this. Is there anything that will help?”

“As winter approaches, I’ve started worrying more. Will we be able to have the traditional holiday celebrations? How will we connect with people if socializing outside isn’t an option? Will the people I care about stay well? And will this ever end? Is there anything that can help me stop worrying so much?”

“It’s been a tough year for me in many ways and the whole idea of creating the holidays my family has come to expect overwhelms me. But the minute I decide to cut back on decorating and buying gifts, I feel guilty. And when I mentioned not baking Christmas cookies this year, my kids were shocked and now I’m worried they’ll be too disappointed if I don’t bake. I’m taking care of my own mother and working full time, and I just don't have the energy or joy in me to do the whole holiday thing.”

To paraphrase A Tale of Two Cities, the holiday season is the best of times, and the worst. The holidays celebrated from November through January, replete with tradition and meaning, guarantee that ceremony and fun will end up co-mingling with pushed buttons and dashed expectations. To help keep your relationships harmonious during the holiday season, I offer a brief summary of what will matter most to the people in your life, and what won’t. There are also a few suggestions here regarding ways to keep the season happy for everyone.