"Her husband and her brother seem to have very similar personalities, yet she gets along well with her husband, but not at all with her brother. Why?"

“I hope you can help me understand my younger brother. Growing up, Gavin ran instead of walked, jumped around when excited, and always seemed busy. When we were little, I wanted to stay inside and color or read, but that bored him. In high school, he was on the pep squad and in theater. Just watching him made me tired and irritable. It still does. We’re in our early twenties now and have both moved back home temporarily to take care of our aging parents during the pandemic. I find myself wanting to be around him less and less, which is pretty hard in a small house with so much shut down these days.”

“My widowed mother passed away earlier this year. My older brother, Paul, was named executor. He is very responsible and orderly and has approached this task like it’s the most important thing in the world. But I think I have something to offer the process. Paul has a woman who wants to buy Mom’s house, but I think the price is too low and we should wait until the pandemic is over. I have tried discussing this, but he refuses to budge. How can I approach Paul and this situation without inflaming it?”

“A supervisor at my brother’s company is retiring in the spring and Jim has been asked to apply for his job. My concern is that Jim is someone who has always loved starting things or making them better, and spends a lot of time in his current position doing just that. In a more supervisory position, I’m concerned that “hands-on” will be seen as interfering or controlling in a job where he’s just supposed to support ongoing operations. How do I talk him out of this change?”

“My brother Joe is in his early forties and works as a cook, which is just his “day job.” His passion is music and playing guitar. About a year ago, Joe met a woman who runs a nursing home. Carol is close to his age, kind and caring, but also very exacting in how she approaches things. Since Joe moved in with Carol, he has changed in very positive ways. He’s less scattered, more organized, and even thinking about going back to college. I’m wondering if there is anything we can do to help Joe in his relationship with Carol. She is so good for him.”

“I’m having a problem with my sister, Anita. We are both working our way up the corporate ladder, and months ago set up to go to a business seminar together in a nearby city. We planned to drive there and back with each other and make a whole day of it. Last week she called and told me that while she will drive to the event with me, she’s going to go straight from it to a “girls only” party at a friend’s nearby cabin. I can certainly drive home alone, but it feels like she’s dumping me and part of our time together for something else.”

“My brother Ted is having trouble with a co-worker who appears very hostile toward him. They work with a group of people in an accounting firm where no one has private offices. Ted takes his job very seriously, but he also likes to socialize with his co-workers. The problem is that whenever he talks to anyone, this particular co-worker gets furious that he’s making noise. Do you have any suggestions?”