“Family is very, very important to me, but I am having trouble with two cousins who appear to have an overwhelming need to control my life. They strongly suggest that I do things the way they do, according to what they think is right. I have friends that seem to act this way toward me, too. When I haven’t done what they suggest, it has caused family rifts and the breakup of friendships. The pushy people in my life also don’t seem to feel the need to apologize for their actions, so it’s often up to me to make the first move, which doesn’t feel right. What can I do?”

“I’m live by myself in Manhattan. My mother recently informed me that my cousin will be moving here. Mom asked if I would help James find a place, get settled, and meet people. I understand he is family but I’ve never really liked James. He always seemed like a wild, pushy kind of guy. Do you have any recommendations on what I can do to stand him for however long it takes to get him settled?”